Finding Your Strengths After a Life Crisis

Life crises—whether they come through loss, trauma, or a major transition—often leave us feeling broken. It can feel like the ground has been pulled out from beneath our feet, and we’re left questioning who we are and how to move forward. But what if this period could also reveal your greatest strengths?

As a trauma-informed, culturally responsive, strengths-based, and solution-focused counselor, I work alongside people who feel like their world has been turned upside down. Together, we uncover the resilience, wisdom, and inner strength that challenging experiences often reveal. While pain is never something we would choose, the growth that can come from it is real and powerful.

Here are some gentle steps to begin finding your strengths after a life crisis:

1. Reflect on Past Challenges: Think back to a time when life felt heavy or you faced a difficult situation. How did you get through it? What did you do that helped you cope or move forward? Maybe you leaned on a friend for support, found comfort in your faith, or used creativity. Perhaps you problem-solved your way forward or simply held on when things felt unbearable. What strengths did you draw on then? Those same inner resources are still within you today.

2. Notice What Helped: Sometimes, we get through life’s toughest moments by drawing on our creativity—like painting, writing, or journaling to process emotions or finding new ways to make ends meet. We problem-solve—balancing work and family under pressure, moving to a new place after a crisis, or navigating parenting challenges. We lean on support networks—talking to a trusted friend, seeking wisdom from elders, or gathering strength from community or social groups. You may have turned to your faith—praying for guidance and comfort or meditating for peace. Or perhaps your cultural values—like family togetherness, generosity toward others or service—kept you grounded. Maybe it was your adaptability—starting over in a new place, adjusting to a life change, or rebuilding after loss—that helped you keep going. These strengths are part of your story—they've helped you survive, and they can also guide you toward healing and growth.

3. Ask for Feedback: Often, the people around us can see our strengths more clearly than we can, especially when we are struggling. A trusted friend, family member, or colleague might notice your calmness in a crisis, your patience with others, or your ability to make people laugh, even in difficult times. Asking, 'What strengths do you see in me?' can offer surprising insights—perhaps they see your resilience after a loss, your leadership at work, or the kindness you show to those around you.

4. Acknowledge Small Wins: Strength doesn’t always look like big, bold actions. Sometimes, it’s simply getting out of bed on a difficult day, putting together a meal when you have no energy, or reaching out to a friend when you feel alone. It could be showing up to work while carrying heavy emotions, getting through a tough conversation, or taking a few deep breaths to steady yourself. These everyday acts are signs of resilience—they show your strength, even when it doesn’t feel that way.

5. Give Yourself Time: Healing and self-discovery are not linear. There will be good days when you feel hopeful and capable and difficult days when progress feels out of reach. Maybe you’ll take steps forward—feeling more at ease, reconnecting with someone, or finding moments of joy—only to feel like you’re back at square one the next day. This is normal. Trust that growth is happening, even when it feels slow. Every small step, every hard day endured, is part of your healing.

Finding your strengths doesn’t mean minimizing what you’ve been through. It means honoring your pain while also recognizing the ways you have endured, adapted, and grown.

If you’re feeling stuck and would like compassionate support to rediscover your strengths, I’m here to help.

Let’s work together to move forward with hope and resilience. Book a session by clicking the ‘Schedule an Appointment’ button in the bottom.

Dr. Amira Fathimath